Done with errors

#4 in a series of sentences you never thought you’d hear yourself saying:

“Don’t cough into the saucepans”

Two posh-looking teenage girls are passing me giggling excitedly and the only bit of the conversation that reaches my ears is:

“….and, like, there he was – literally trying to rape her…”

“If you don’t buy me a scooter I will wipe my nose on you.”

People letting off fireworks this morning that they were too lazy to find in the dark last night.

At least cover them up and set them off tonight!

Mummy: “Don’t keep spitting on the mirror.”

Child #2 [disappointed]: “But I love it!”

There is a ‘sensory garden’ placed at the end of a platform at Swindon railway station. I’m not sure if it’s for the blind, but I’m sure even they would be disappointed with it. It’s a small enclosure with a bench and a pot of dead ivy. I should have got a photo of it to add to my collection of Scenes of Despair…

Why don’t banks have an automated phone line (free, of course) that you call when you want to access your online account. It asks for a couple of bits of information and then gives you a temporary PIN number. Wouldn’t that be a good idea?